Several Love Stories and a Fond Farewell............
Not so long ago (18 years ) I was going from dog pound to dog pound looking for the perfect companion. The day was long and sad but I knew I just hadn't found the perfect match. I just knew that somebody was waiting somewhere. I just had to find him. After a long day I stumbled into the Santa Monica dog pound in California. I was exhausted and getting weary. I got to the front desk and simply asked them to give me whatever dog was slated to be euthanized next. They brought out this big goofy black Lab mix and said he was on his way into the room as we spoke. He spotted a tennis ball in the corner of the waiting room and immediately ran over and started throwing it in the air and catching it. They told me he was found tied to the guardrail in the center of the Hollywood Freeway.
We have been together ever since. Until today that is. Gulliver let us know a day or so ago that he was in pain and was ready to say goodbye. I called the vet and they recommended giving him Benadryl until we could get him in to the Hospital. He left us at 10:30 this morning with both daddies and Tater present. And his Squishy Fish.
We are all wandering around a little trying to still figure out how we will make it but while we do that please share a few moments of his beautiful life with us.
Kevin and I met and Gulliver and Dexter fell in love with him. Like they had a choice right. He has sat with Gulliver 24 hours a day for the past year. He was unable to attend my dad's funeral because we could not leave our Buddy alone. They have been best friends for all the years Kevin and I have been together. He is heartbroken and almost inconsolable. He cared for my mom the same way. He was there. He made breakthroughs that nobody else seemed to be able to make. I love him dearly, not just for how we feel about each other but also for how he has taken care of those who mean so much to me.
Tater joined us almost sixteen years ago. She and Gulliver have been inseperable ever since. They have been a married couple much like their two daddies. She has kept vigil and licked him on his nose for months now. We took her with us and she was a good girl. She sat by his side all night last night. She didn't sleep a wink. She kissed and loved on him and must have known his time with her was coming close to the end. She was with him when he left us. She didn't snarl at the Vet. She held her tennis ball for Gulliver to see and she licked him while we held her close.
And then there is me. I've cried my weight in tears several times over as I contemplated losing him. I picked a bouquet of flowers to take with us. Three pink roses (one for each Kitty Sister), a big white Snowball Hydrangea (Tater), and two sticks of purple sage blossoms (his old daddies take great comfort in herbs these days). He has been with me through things no living human being could fathom me doing. No other person or being has seen me drunk in 20 years. He was there for the worst. He greated me at the door each day, slept at my side for the past 18 years, and has awaited my return whenever business or family took me out of town. Kevin would hold the phone to his ear but could scarcely get him to leave the back door while he awaited my safe return.
He has never been bad in the traditional sense. Generally his "bad" has been more funny than bad.
He has single handedly snuck about 40 meals off the barbecue. He has climbed gingerly out of windows and gotten stuck. When the big earthquake hit in Los Angeles, before I met Kevin he let me know something was terribly wrong by sitting on my chest and peeing. He has had lots of inopportune erections. They have even shown up in pictures after the fact,lol.
It's hard loving me. I'm distant, hard to warm up to. I generally find love in those who can't help but love me. I return the love in my own way and sometimes it is not all that the other party may need. But all he ever needed to be happy was to see me walk through the door and so all I ever needed was the same.
So this is by far the saddest day of my life thus far. More even than when I lost both my parents. He has been with me for the very best and the very worst days of my life but always remained loyal, steadfast, and true to heart.
There will never be another Gulliver. I thank you all for the kindness and words of empathy. It has helped us so much. Although it has been a long process it has given me time to deal and accept this and understand that he will never ever feel pain again and nothing bad can ever happen. I have but one goal in life and that is to outlive all my pets so that nothing bad can ever happen to them. For all the love and joy I have been provided I will shed many tears. I will feel this loss every day for the rest of my life but I will also take to my grave the peacefulness of heart knowing that no other living creature on this planet ever loved me as much as he did. And I will love him forever. I will miss him always.
Goodbye dearest friend. We'll take care of your little girl. Always watch over me and keep me near you. I will never forget the love you gave me and I will miss you always. I will keep your Fishie with me and await your safe return to my side. That is where you will remain until they bury me. I plan on taking you with me.
Daddy
Comments
Love,
Laurie
Love to you both - and to the other babies...take care.
I am so sorry for your loss. I, like Valerae, had been thinking about you guys and Gully recently and wondering....and knowing the time was near.
Such happiness and such sadness. This is a wonderful tribute to such a beloved companion, friend, and family member. Its obvious how much you all loved and adored Gully....and your loss brings tears to me, too.
Loss is the hardest on those left behind. He, on the other hand, is free and romping around, without pain, in doggy heaven.....and waiting for you to bring him his fishie.....someday.
May you all find peace.
Love and hugs, Dee
I'm so sorry to hear the news. This is such a beautiful and loving tribute to your dear Gulliver. The scene at the vet - I have no words. Non-pet people just don't understand what it is to lose a pet, how it can sometimes be even worse than losing a human in your life. Your lives were all richer for being together, but those of you left behind will all soldier on to provide the same loving environment for each other.
Take good care.
But think back to that day he almost was put to death as a youngster. Oh.my.god.
What a fantastic life he led with you and with all of his family.
That pain is indescribable.
Only time helps.
This is the best possible tribute. And you are the best possible doggy daddy.
Hugs to the whole family.
Tosh, Marley, Diogi and I will light a candle for Gully tonight after I read them your stories.
You were very loved, and were able to be generous and loving in return.
What a great gift.
(((((Big hugs to you and Kevin and ESPECIALLY to Tater.)))))
Hugs, love, and the best thoughts,
Zola
xx
jaypo
A gentle and heart-felt essay about love given to and received from a friend who is waiting for you even now. You and Kevin gave him another chance at life and Gulliver has thanked you for nearly 20 years. It's just that even the largest of hearts gets tired and needs to sleep.
Grieve and remember - and then celebrate the joys you had.
thanks for sharing this heartfelt tribute with us.
distant? you? oh come on. you're one of the sweetest persons ever. And Gulliver was so lucky to find his two daddies. May he go to a nice, warm place full of tasty meals, large meadows to run freely, and squishy fishes by the dozen. I hug you and Kev VERY tight...and I strongly urge you to honor Gulliver giving all that love to another endangered dog...
I'm on a friend's comp (no internet on weekends) so I just skimmed through. I will read it properly on Monday and write something more wordy. Right now all I can do is bite back my tears and keep you all in my thoughts.
Much love and blessings to you, Kev and Tater. I'm sure it was an honour for him to be a part of your family - and for you to be his.
((((HUGS))))
-Suga'