QotD: Pickup Artist

Nov 14, 2006 at 10:26 PM
10 comments

What's the worst pickup line you've ever heard?
Submitted by ShellEy.

I am changing the rules and posting the worst one I ever used. It is far worse than any one that has ever been used on me. Here goes....are you ready......"Wanna see my Frog"! I used it on my partner Kevin almost 15 years ago and I guess it worked. He has never left my side. actually had a large pet African Bullfrog named Splif. he was the size of a grape when I got him and when we moved to new York he was as big as a cantaloupe. We gave him to a frog collector because I kne it would be too tough on him in New York and just the trip across country. I had him on my dresser in a Pagoda. He was very surprised to see that I really had a frog...2 Gecko's, 2 birds, a dog, a cat. We also got another dog, two more cats, an Iguana, a tarantula, a turtle, fish and a Partridge in a Pear Tree.

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Haha, that is pretty bad! I had a little frog when I was a little girl, I caught him (or her) as a tadpole. My mom got tired of him and she let him out in our backyard and I never saw the little guy again.

Oh, cornball! So adorable!

Oh wow...I remember that frog...How I miss the days...

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You should of seen the look on my face when we got to his bedroom and he REALLY HAD A FROG!!! When we gave Spleef away I cried, yes I cried over a pet frog. He had his own personality and was really had quite the attitude. I miss Spleef. It's really strange how attached some of us get to our pets no matter what they are. Someday on my blog I will write about my Peruvian Blue Iguana that I had. Her name? Gladys Kravitz of course.

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I really think that is one of hte BEST lines ever. My hubby and I met at a Toga party in our dorm. After dancing and drinking we made a date for the next week, and voila', I was invited to my husband's room to see his "gerbils". Lol! He really DID have gerbils....and I had a pet rat.
Love at first bite! ;)

As for animals and their personalities.....my son's giant african millipede, Pedey, (yes, pedey) had the best personality EVER. He was kind, wise, gentle, and recognized certain people that he liked to walk on and ones he didn't. There's a pic of him on my blog.

Dancing Bear replied to Lauri’s comment:
Nov 15, 2006
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I have seen Petey and he is wonderful. We have enriched our lives with so many little Pedeys but together they don't have half the legs your little guy does.

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I need to write a story called A Frog Named Splif. Set in Jamaica, it would be the tale of a travelling musician who happens to have a crippling fear of water, making it impossible for him to ever leave the island -- that is until he meets up with a most unexpected travelling companion: a mute frog the size of a canteloupe with a penchant for smoking huge, conical joints. As they wind their way from one end of the island to the other, the musician teaches the frog to sing and the frog teaches the musician to swim. The ending sees the musician on a boat for America after having just buried his amphibious friend in a green field of the finest Jamaican ganja.

Glad the pickup line worked for you, because... well... nevermind.

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ROFL, Kirk. You really DO need to write that story! It reminds me of Life of Pi, no wait, more something by Christopher Moore! The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove! :)

Being his father, of course I would have an all access pass to the large conical joints. I would certainly allow him to teach swimming as long as he shared his bag of "the chronic" with me. Now, I must say I have seen a singing frog but it was on a cartoon and he sings "Hello my baby, hello my darling, hello my regtime band. I believe his name was Michigan J. but Splif , after some coaching might play him in the Lifetime Movie (starring Meridith Baxter Birnie) He was a good frog. Big sucka also. Kevin actually made him a "House of Blues" out of corrugated tin in his vivarium and he would sit near it and look splendid.

QotD: Pickup Artist

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